Get 'Em Active. But Ask, Don't Demand.

As a parent, you want the best for you kids, both mentally and physically. Sometimes it's easy to over impose your own desires and wants on your kids without really finding out what they want. As a parent, I've learned that sometimes you have to step back and forget about your "likes" and let your child share what they love about life. Just because you were a football star in high school (that definitely wasn't me, ha!) doesn't mean your child will want that too. This post is as much a reminder to myself as it is to anyone reading it. My own children have activity and weight issues and I'm exploring the best ways to turn that around without pushing them away. If you have teenagers (or even just know a teenager), you know what I mean.

Today's fast-paced, media-driven, and get-it-now lifestyle has definitely made life a lot easier, but at the same time, it's made for a generation of overweight and obese children. In fact this is the first generation to have a shorter life expectancy than their parents. That's really sad news. The great news is that it can be turned around.

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When I was but a wee lad, outside was my entertainment. Now, some of the things we did outside, I'd die if I knew my kids were doing (i.e., pretending to be the 6-Million Dollar Man and jumping off the roof of the garage to practice our forward roll upon landing; climbing over the lumber yard fence and using planks to cross from one 15-foot stack of 2x4s to another, etc...). Funny thing though is that even with me playing out doors, I still went through a "fat kid" stage around 5-8th grade. I wasn't into team athletics so I didn't have a regimented workout like my brother who played baseball, football, tennis, to help keep the weight off. I really do believe, however, that the fact that I played outdoors kept me from becoming bigger than I was. I looked back at pictures of myself when I was "fat" and compared them to today's overweight kids, and I look pretty darn normal.

I don't think organized sports are for every kid, but because so many who are not involved in organized sports are stuck inside watching, TV, playing computer games, and/or surfing the net, they're not able to burn off enough calories each day to keep their weight at a healthy level. The sedentary lifestyle coupled with fast food and highly refined and processed foods are the main culprits in this huge increase in childhood obesity. Youngsters are even being diagnosed with high cholesterol and type 2 diabetes. Maybe if the ultra realistic video games of today reverted back to the "Pong" of my era, kids would return to the outdoors.

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I was really disheartened the other day when I heard Steve Jobs say that the keyboard computer would soon be a thing of the past and that computers would all go to a touch screen. That gives me a heavy heart for two reasons. First, as a writer, it's just one more foot in the grave for the written word. For many (myself included) using pen and paper or the keyboard is a part of the creative process. Sometimes my fingers just have a mind of their own and go to town. Then I have to go back and clean up what they produced. But somewhere in the garble ends up some cool stuff. I'm just not convinced that same thing will happen with touch screens. Although, I guess back-in-the-day, users of manual typewriters probably said the same thing about the electric typewriters and then the laptop.

Second, it just seems one more step closer to the reality portrayed in the Disney movie Wall-e. In the movie, the last remaining humans are on a ship in outer space looking for a home. Everything has become so automated that the humans have become huge blobs that can barely move. They lay in floating hover-bed lounge-chairs which they never leave. They drink smoothies because they're too weak to prepare their own food.

Okay, enough dooms day. I'm not a prude. I really do like invention and advancement. I use a laptop everyday. I have a Garmin to track my distance and mileage. We do have a big flat screen digital TV, but we have no cable or dish. I think technology and advancement is wonderful, but not at the risk of our kids' health. Just the fact that our kids have a shorter life expectancy than ours should be enough of an eye opener that as a society we strive to put exercise, play, and the outdoors back into our children's lives. Research does show that active children have better test scores!

Okay, I'll stop ranting and get back to the point of this post, "Ask, Don't Demand." Taking away the computer, shutting off the TV, and discontinuing cable, may work for some in getting their kids outdoors and into being more active, but I think a different approach may work just as well if not better.

Schedule some outside trips with your kids, but kept the activities open so that your kids have some choice in what they do. Or maybe over the course of a few weeks have them experience several different things to see what sparks an interest—hiking, biking, running, Frisbee football, frisbee golf, wiffle ball, swimming, badminton. When I was in middle school my older brother and I set up an "official" badminton court in our backyard. We had a whole series of tournaments between us and played that entire summer. It was big fun.

Another approach to take is to try inviting your kids to join you in your favorite activity. Tell them you'll take it easy on them. That's usually enough of a challenge to get them out there. If they say no, dig a little to find out what they're interested in. It may be that they're really interested in mountain biking, but have never said anything because you're into running. Or maybe it's dance or gymnastics. Now there are limits. I'm not donning a tutu, but I will sign my daughter up for dance class and root her on whole-heartedly from the sidelines if that's her area of interest. The point is, find out what your child is interested in. Sometimes all they're waiting for is an invite. Other times is maybe that they're waiting for you to ask what they're interested in.

A few months back I told my 14-year old that I was starting a beginning running group at my fitness studio. I told her that if she and her best friend wanted to join the group, that would be awesome. That's all I said. A week later, she came to me to ask more questions about the group and who'd be in it. Eventually she and her buddy both joined the group and completed the 10-week program. This past week (while on vacation at the beach), she even got me up early 5 of the 8 days we were there to run. Next week we're running a 5K together to celebrate July 4th and her accomplishment. This was such a success (I think) because of the invite.

I'm holding a 4-week bootcamp at the studio in July and my daughter came to me the other day and said, "So, Dad. You gonna make me do this bootcamp too?" Then she gave me a big grin and we both began to laugh.

So, if you're not already, get active with your kids. I'll be working on it in my household. Invite your family to join you in your favorite activity and explore their interests too. There's a lot of healthy fun and memory-making to be had outdoors.

RunnerDude's Runner of the Week: Tim Wilson

I've been following this week's Runner of the Week—Tim Wilson— through his blog and on Twitter for quite a while. His story of a complete lifestyle turnaround for himself and his family is truly amazing. Read on to find out more about Tim's story.

RD: Where are you from?

Tim: Currently live in Gwinnett County in NE Atlanta.

RD: Share a little about yourself. What do you do for a living? Hobbies?
Tim: I have been happily married for 20 years and have three awesome kids, two daughters in high school, and a son in elementary. I am a programmer, mainly working with .NET technologies and mainly for the web, but also am kinda an IT jack of all trades since I work for a smaller company. For hobbies I don't have many. I tend to focus on a couple things at a time. My first and foremost is running, and second is blogging and everything that goes along with it from a social media and technical standpoint. Of course my wife and kids and all their activities are important, but I don't consider those hobbies.

RD: How long have you been running?
Tim: I have been running for just over 3 years, I started in February of 2007.

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RD: What got you into running?
Tim: I used to run XC and track in high school and loved it. I tried a few times over the years but never got very far. I was changing my lifestyle and losing weight. I started just walking, but then one day decided I would try running. It was slow going and very short, but grew each time I tried. I guess you could say my poor health and wanting to change it got me into running.

RD: What do you enjoy most about running?
Tim: I love so much about it that I just don't know where to start or end. I love how it makes me feel, how much energy it gives me, how I don't have to worry about myself physically and how I can eat. :) I also love the camaraderie and community around it and the change it has made in my life and my family's life.

RD: What are your favorite training foods?
Tim: I have never really thought about this before. I like food period.

RD: I'm with you on that. I eat pretty healthful food, but I love my chocolate cake once in a blue moon too! LOL!

RD: Are you a lone runner or do you run with some buddies? What do you like about each?
Tim: I am mainly a lone runner. 95% of my running is done alone in the wee hours of the morning. I like the flexibility of being a lone runner since I can then go when, where, and however far or fast I want to. I do really enjoy running with my kids as well though and running with a running group at least once a week. This is all fairly new though in the past year, and the group runs in the past couple months. I like the group runs because you tend to get outside your comfort zone and push a bit harder than by yourself.

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RD: What’s the funniest or oddest thing that’s happened to you while on a run?
Tim: I could tell (and have told) a lot of stories about this so it is hard to find just one. Two years ago I was just coming off of setting a new 5k PR in the toughest course I have ever run. I was hoping to set a new PR and hopefully drop under 21:00 in my upcoming race the second week in June 2008. I lined up near the front and was ready to go. The gun went off and I started, but didn't get far. Less than 100 yards into the race I was tripped while in mid-stride and went down hard on my shoulder and head. After getting up it didn't take long to find that I had broken my collar bone in multiple places. 8 months off from running and multiple surgeries later I felt like I was almost starting over. The next year when I ran that race I wasn't anywhere near setting the PR much less getting anywhere near the 21:00 time. I was also a bit nervous running the first time back, but I was running it with my daughter so I had a bodyguard. :)

RD: Ouch! Good comeback man!

RD: For the good or the bad, how has running affected you personally?
Tim: It has changed my life completely. It is one of the main driving factors in my life. It has given me a way to help lose 90 pounds and more importantly a way to keep it off. It has brought back energy that I had lost for so long, and it has given me something to pass along to my kids and others that know me personally, through my blog, or through any other social media. It is truly one of the best feelings to be told that you were the inspiration for someone that is running, eating better, or just living a healthier life.

RD: What’s your biggest running accomplishment? Why?
Tim: My biggest running accomplishment would be my first 5k, because without it I would have never had the desire, drive, or ability to continue on to run that 26.2.... the second biggest accomplishment. My first 5k I came in dead last in the race, even being beat by someone running with a hernia, but that race was the stepping stone that I needed at that time to keep going and keep trying.

RD: Do you have a favorite brand of running shoe? Which model? Why?
Tim: I have run in NB 767, 768, 769's exclusively until these past few weeks. I had good luck and didn't want to change. I was recently sent a pair of Pearl iZumi SyncroFuel XC's and have been running in them a lot lately as well. If I had to choose right now I would choose the Pearl iZumi's.

RD: Cool. I'm pretty loyal to a shoe once I find one that works well for me too. I'm lucky in that I get to test-drive lots of different shoes for various shoe companies and recently I test out a pair of the SyncroFuel XC train shoes and the road version too. I was impressed with them as well.

RD: What’s your favorite race distance(s)? Do you have a favorite race you run each year?
Tim: My favorite race distance is probably the half marathon, but of course only if I have been training for it. If I haven't been training for it, it is just 13 miles of torture and .1 of pure bliss..... or at least just really slow. My favorite race though is a 5k, specifically the 5k I mentioned above. It is the Saratoga 5k Fun Run. It is a very small local race that is run in a neighborhood without closing any roads. It was the first race I ever ran in, and the race that I finished dead last in. What makes it even more special was that it was also it's very first running. Only myself and one other runner has run it every time for the 4 years it has been run. Even though I came in dead last the first year, I finished second overall the second year (no, I am not that fast, it is just a very small race) The added benefit is that this is the hilliest course I have ever run and where I still hold my 5k PR.

RD: If you were speaking to a group of non-runners or runner wannabes and trying to encourage them to run, what would you say?
Tim: Take it slow at first. Don't expect to run very far the first time, or even for a while..... and that is OK! Build it up slowly and don't try to go too fast (while running, or while building up to a mile and beyond). Take the time and the money and go get fitted for some good running shoes, without them you may not be running long, or may be running in more pain and doing more damage than you need to.

RD: Open Mike: Share anything you‘d like about your running experiences, past accomplishments, goals, dreams….anything you haven’t previously shared.
Tim: If you have ever read my blog you know I am not known to be short winded but let me give it a shot. As I mentioned earlier, I started running while losing weight. More specifically I let myself get horribly out of shape after high school and put on close to 100 pounds of unneeded blubber. I finally had a doctor tell me I needed to lose weight at the end of 2006, so decided to make it happen starting January of 2007. Running was a key part of the 90 pound weight loss I had that year. Running has also changed my family tree. None of my kids would have been interested in running since we lead such a sedentary lifestyle, but because I am now a runner all of my kids have taken up the sport. One of my daughter's just finished her freshman year in high school where she ran varsity on XC and ran in state. She also was very competitive in track where her older sister joined her in running. They are both currently training for XC in the fall. My 8-year-old son has run with me off and on but is still trying to find the love that his older sisters have. Following my first marathon I took some time to back off the miles a bit. I have plans to run at least one marathon in the fall and may start training for an ultra sometime after that.

Thanks Tim for sharing your story! I can't wait to eventually read the recap of that ultra!! You truely are an inspiration to runners, Dad's, and familys everywhere! Be sure to check out Tim's blog—26.2 Quest.

Over 1000 Run Their First 5K!

Many of you know that have the honor and privilege of being a board member for a wonderful nonprofit organization called GO FAR (Go Out For A Run). GO FAR is a 10-week program that trains elementary-aged kids (mainly 3rd, 4th, and 5th graders) to run their first 5K. In addition to the running, the program also fosters character-building skills and teaches the young participants how to make good fitness and nutrition decisions.

This past Saturday, over 1,000 runners (mostly kids ages 8-12) participated in the Spring 2010 GO FAR 5K in High Point, NC, to celebrate the completion of their GO FAR programs. Students from 24 area elementary schools that host GO FAR programs as well as a few other non-school-related organizations that host GO FAR programs participated in the race. It was quite a site seeing hundreds of kids clad in school-colored GO FAR shirts, gathered around school tents, while doing group stretching with their GO FAR coaches prior to the race. Some were even doing motivational cheers to pump themselves up for the big event. Not only did I see kids and coaches, I saw entire families participating.

I was honored that Robin Lindsay (GO FAR founder) asked me to video tap the event again this year. I had a blast going from group to group getting footage of all the excited participants prior, during, and after the race. While videotaping, I even helped one poor little guy who got a tummy ache during the run by walking with him a few blocks. I thought he was going to have to sit out, then all of the sudden he got a burst of energy and was gone....left me in his dust. Now that's sticktoitness! I saw the little fella later and he was laughing and having a great time with his fellow running buddies.

To find out more about GO FAR and how to bring the program to your school or community, be sure to check out their website.

Below is my video creation. I hope you have as much fun watching it as I did making it.

RunnerDude Chats with Jeff Galloway

A week or so ago, Lisa a good friend and running buddy of mine shared the exciting news that Jeff Galloway is going to be the featured speaker at a benefit being held in High Point, NC for GO FAR, a nonprofit organization that teaches youngsters about making healthy choices as well as training them for their first 5K race. I've followed Jeff Galloway since I was a youngster. Even though I was never very athletic as a kid, I always looked forward to the Olympics every four years. The very first Olympics that I remember and remember in vivid detail was in the summer of 1972. I loved stretching out on the harvest gold shag carpet in front of our black-and-white console TV with the rabbit ears on top watching the athletes compete. I also remember that summer because we finally got air conditioning in the house (a window unit in the family room).

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I was only 7, but I remember a lot about those Olympics—terrorists taking members of the Israeli Olympic team hostage, Olga Korbut's outrageous backbend on the balance beam, Mark Spitz winning seven gold medals, and Frank Shorter winning the marathon. I also remember three members of the US track team—Frank Shorter, Jack Bacheler, and Jeff Galloway—because they had all been on the same track team at FSU. Today, I can barely remember what TV program I'm watching when I get up for a snack, but for some reason, I can remember vivid details from just about all the Olympics since 1972—when I was only 7. Does that mean in 30 years, I'll remember what TV show I was watching?

So, in addition to sharing the good news, Lisa (who's involved in organizing the GO FAR benefit) said it might be possible for me to interview Jeff, if he was interested. Soon after, I contacted Mr. Galloway and luckily he was gracious enough to accept the interview offer. I've admired Jeff and his career for many years and this interview instills further my admiration for such a talented and committed teacher, trainer, and athlete. Read on to learn more about my conversation with Jeff Galloway...

RD: I see you have North Carolina roots. I believe you were born in Raleigh, NC. How long did you live in NC?

Jeff: I was born in Raleigh. I spent several of the best years of my youth in NC, off and on. My Dad was in the Navy, and when he was at sea, we stayed mostly with my mothers parents in Raleigh. My grandfather was Director of Vocational Rehabilitation for NC for about 30 years. He would pick me up after school and take me to his "farm" on Falls of the Neuse road.

RD: Several years ago, I read where you had been overweight and not very athletic as a child. When I read this, it really endeared you to me. In one of your bio’s you mention how as a youth, you “searched for the lowest level of exertion you could get away with in exercise.” That was me to a T! I too was an overweight child. I think I may have been the original couch potato at least until age 13 when I decided to make a change. Ironically that was the same age you made a change. If I recall correctly, an after-school program requirement kind of forced you to make a change. Share a little about that time as a 13-year-old (an overweight, non-athletic 13-year-old) having to join a sports activity.

Jeff: Yes, I was a fat kid. Like many children in Navy families, I attended 13 schools by the time I finished the 7th grade. At this point my father became a teacher, we moved to Atlanta, and my new school required each boy to work out with an athletic team after school every day. Because of the moves, I had avoided sports and exercise, did not have sports skills, had become lazy, and had gained a lot of weight.

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My patchwork of educational experiences had not prepared me for the demanding and competitive academic environment at this Prep school, and I was struggling. The principal's comment on the report card was “A little more of a push next year and Jeff will make the top half of the class” I was already studying more hours every week than most of the students I knew, who were scoring better on tests. I believed that I was intellectually inferior.

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During the Fall I tried football, which was a total disaster from my perspective, and that of my coaches. Before choosing a sport for the next quarter, I asked several of the other lazy kids for their choices and was surprised to hear that many had chosen Winter Track Conditioning. The consensus among the slackers was that the track coach was the most lenient in the school. “Tell him you are running on the trails, and you only have to jog 200 yards to the woods and hide out.”

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I did just that for 2 days. On the third day, an older athlete I liked, looked at me and said “Galloway, you're running with us today”. I quickly came up with my strategy: as we entered the woods I planned to grab my hamstring, claiming a muscle pull. But the jokes started right away, and I kept running to hear the punch line. As I began to get really tired, they started telling gossip about the teachers. I didn't last long the first day, but pushed a bit farther with them day after day and started joining the political and psychological arguments.

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Most of these cross country runners were on the academic honor roll. But the controversial arguments led me to believe that I was just as intelligent as the others. Each academic period my grades improved and I too, made the honor roll. More important, I had become a member of the group and set a new standard for myself due to group expectations.

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I was most surprised about how good I felt after a run. The after-run attitude boost was better than I had experienced after any activity, during my young life. The camaraderie and fun during those runs kept me coming back and after 10 weeks I was hooked on endorphins and friendship. I continue to be...over 50 years later.

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It was commonly known, even back in the 50's, that over half of the cross country team members were among the best students and leaders in school organizations. University of Illinois Professor Charles Hillman, as reported by Newsweek magazine, noticed that the woman's cross country team set the curve on his neuroscience/kinesiology tests every semester. So he started a study of elementary children comparing physical activity with academic achievement. He discovered that the kids who were fitter, were also the best students. Various studies, around the world, have found the following:

• Regular exercise increases the level of BDNF (brain-derived neurotrophic factor) necessary for learning, memory and higher brain activities


• Regular aerobic exercise stimulates growth of new brain cells, at any age


• Regular vigorous exercise causes existing nerve cells to work quicker and more efficiently


• Even one 30 minute aerobic exercise session stimulates areas in the brain needed for critical thinking and produced better test results than before the exercise.

RD: Speaking of fitness and academics, your book FIT KIDS—SMARTER KIDS is a wonderful tool to help kids learn how to make better choices and become physically fit. I wish I had had a copy when I was a youngster. I’m sure your childhood experience was a key factor in your decision to write FIT KIDS, but what other factors contributed to your writing the book?

Jeff: I started writing FIT KIDS—SMARTER KIDS to help families, teachers and kids gain control over their fitness, vitality and attitude. After a meeting with several experts in this field at CDC in Atlanta, I was told to look into the connection between regular exercise and better academic performance. I list some of the many studies, showing this, in the book. It is clear that if teachers, school boards and parents want their kids to learn better, they need to encourage them to exercise—it unlocks brain cells.

RD: FIT KIDS is all about making fitness a family affair. If kids see their parents being active, they are much more likely to be active themselves. You definitely practice what you preach. Your wife Barbara is a very accomplished runner herself. How about your two boys, Brennan and Westin? Are they runners too? Share a little about fitness and your family.

Jeff: Barbara and I met on the track, she worked in the first Phdippides stores, and we were married about a year later. That's been 34 great years. Brennan and Westin both ran in high school and college and still run. Westin ran the 800 for Wake Forest and had a great collegiate experience there.

RD: Another aspect of “Jeff Galloway” that I find so intriguing is that you’re a spokesman for the average runner and walker. With your amazing credentials, you could spend 100% of your time working exclusively with elite runners, but instead you devote much of your time to the everyday runner. Your commitment to sharing with others how to make running a lifestyle that can stay with them a lifetime is awesome. What inspired you to move in this direction? Why reach out to the regular everyday runner (like me)?

Jeff: My father (Wake Forest grad) founded an innovative school, and struggled against odds to make it a success. He worked with individual kids, teachers and parents, to help each unlock learning blocks and assume responsibility for his/her own education. I saw the joy he received as individuals were empowered. I found the same joy in helping individual runners solve problems and tell me the amazing empowerment they receive as they push past their challenges without injury. I hear from about 100 runners every day, and have found solutions to almost all of the problems experienced.

RD: The Galloway RUN-WALK-RUN™ method has its critics, but the fact is it’s helped thousands of runners successfully complete marathons all over the country—the world for that matter. Most critics are silenced when they learn that experienced runners have even PR’d using the method. I think it’s an awesome alternative to the traditional method of race training. How did the method evolve?

Jeff: You're correct—every year I hear from hundreds who qualify for Boston by using run-walk-run. We started using it in our Galloway Training Program groups in the 70's as a way for couch potatoes to finish a marathon, without injury, in 6 months. But more and more of the veterans used it to recover fast, doing what they wanted to do even after very long runs. During the last 15 years, we've fine-tuned it to help everyone stay injury free—even the Boston qualifiers.

RD: I hear from runners all over the country and try to share as many of their stories on the blog as I can. Their stories are so inspiring. Just the other day after a run in the park, I bumped into a friend of mine, Joyce (who's an avid walker). She's in her 70's and she was telling me how frustrated she was that over the winter she wasn't able to walk as much as usual due to all the bad weather we've had. She was upset, because she was now off her walking pace by several minutes. I want to be like Joyce and get mad when I'm off my pace when I'm 74. What an inspiration! You’ve coached runners of all abilities all over the world. Share a little about one or two runners you’ve coached or worked with that for whatever reason made an impact or impression that’s stuck with you over the years.

Jeff: In my various books I have written the stories of many "heroes" who overcame major challenges to finish marathons. In every case they discovered hidden strengths that improved the quality of their lives in many ways. Lee Kilpack for example, started running at the age of 59 to recover from a round of chemo therapy. She discovered a life enrichment that took away the depression of the cancer threat. She is not free of cancer today but is much happier, more energetic, loves life each day—which was not the case during her pre-cancer/pre running years. Iris Vinegar joined our Galloway Training group in Raleigh at the age of 74, to fulfill a "bucket list" goal. She discovered a new self understanding that "age is just a number". More than a dozen marathons later, at the "number" of 82, Iris looks better, feels better and runs smoother than ever. Among the studies cited in my RUNNING UNTIL YOU'RE 100 book are those showing that each hour you exercise, extends life statistically by 2 hours. The quality of life enhancement is an even greater benefit.

RD: Man, if gaining 2 hours of life for every 1 hour of exercise doesn't help get people to exercise, I'm not sure what will. Many sedentary people give the excuse that they don’t have enough time to fit in running or fitness, yet you manage to stay fit, and still run competitively even with a schedule that has you presenting workshops all over the country most months of the year. How do you manage to fit in the running and exercise needed to keep you in shape?

Jeff: My experience, which is backed up by research, shows me that my daily run helps me solve problems quicker, do more work during the day than when not exercising. The last 4 presidents exercised daily. If you're using the excuse "No time for exercise", then ask yourself "Am I more busy than the President."

RD: What tips or advice do you have for all the readers who are just beginning a running program or maybe still in the thinking-about-running phase?

Jeff: First, try to find a group. In our Galloway GETTING STARTED groups, most tell us that they would not stay with the program if they didn't have their group. If you just have one friend, form a 2 person group.

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Start by running for 5-10 seconds/walking for the rest of the minute. Start with 10 minutes and increase by 3-4 minutes each workout (every other day). After you've reached 30 minutes with no problems, increase the running to 10-15 seconds/walking for the rest of the minute. After 3-6 sessions, if you wish, increase by another 5 seconds of running/decreasing the walking by 5 seconds. Never try to run continuously—use walk breaks from the beginning to give you control over your fatigue.

RD: What’s new on the horizon for Jeff Galloway? Will you really still be running at 100?

Jeff: Yes, my goal is to run until I'm 100 and, at 64, I'm well on my way. Since 1979, I've not had a running injury—that's when I started taking walk breaks. Every day I communicate with an average of over 100 runners. As I hear about the ways my suggestions have reduced injuries, sped up recovery, improved finish times, I fine-tune my methods used in my running schools, Galloway training programs, wonderful retreats and e-coaching. I pledge to never stop looking for ways of enhancing the running experience—which enriches life.

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Keep an eye out for Jeff's newest book CROSS COUNTRY due out in the fall.

Be a Healthy Role Model For Your Kids—Run!

One of the best ways to ensure a healthy lifestyle for your kids is to live by example. My daughter just recently emerged from the mysterious, dark, oddly scary, sometimes demonic stage of a 13-year-old. I'm happy to say she survived (as did myself and my wife) and she's now a beautiful blossoming 14-yr-old freshman in high school.

During this phase of the battle-of-the-wills, you probably think your child (son or daughter) could care less about your opinion. Ever have your child tell you to drop him/her off a block from school so nobody will see him/her get out of a mini-van? Ever have your child threaten to die if you open your mouth around their friends? Ever have your child say, "Seriously, you're not really going to wear that when you take me and my friends to the movies, are you?" And on the flip side, have you found yourself saying, "Honey, did you look in the mirror before leaving home?" "This is a brush, it's your friend, it's for your hair." or "Could you please put on a coat, so the school doesn't call Child Services on me?"

During those times, you think your child isn't hearing a word you're saying, but guess what? She is. She won't admit it, but she is. Your child actually wants your feedback and guidance, but those raging hormones and the peer pressure of her friends won't let her admit it. Every now and then, that sweet child (you once knew) emerges from beneath that creature-from-the-black-lagoon (that's temporarily overtaken your child's body) giving you a glimmer of hope.

Don't worry, your child will return to humanity. Some take longer than others, but he/she will return. During this possession phase, be diligent about being a healthy role model for your child. Silently showing your child each day positive ways you deal with stress through being physically active and eating healthy is what they need to see. Every now and then invite them for a walk, a run, or to join you at the gym. Share with them the latest sports drink you've discovered. Show them the great doctors report you got. Tell them about a cool article you just read in Runner's World. Invite them to the next 5K you're running, even if they're a spectator and not running. Then let them know how wonderful it was to see them when you crossed the finish line.

Even though your invites may be rejected or the only verbal response you get is a huff or a grunt, that inner sweet child buried beneath that tough facade, really does appreciate you asking and sharing. She's learning by your example.

All last year, I asked my daughter to run with me, only to get a "Right Dad." in response. Guess what? Now she's walking every afternoon after school. Her older brother told me she had started walking, but I didn't say anything. Then the other day she came up to me all beaming and said, "Dad, I walked 2 miles today!" I was so proud of her and she was so proud of herself. She's not running, and that's okay. She may move into running one day, but for now she's walking and getting in some great exercise.

Then I got another whopping surprise. One afternoon, she said, "Dad, the PE teacher at school fussed at me because he thought I was playing around when we were doing walking back lunges. I wasn't playing around. I can't do them!" She was in tears. So that night we had a crash course in walking back lunges. She cried more tears, because they actually were very hard for her to do. But, she hung in there and could do them by morning. Not great ones, but that didn't matter because she had gained the confidence that she could do them. Later the next day, she came running up to me and said, "Dad, the coach said, 'Nice improvement, Rayna!'" I was so proud of her. That was such a special moment. Funny how the simple little things are the most meaningful.

I seriously believe that during that scary 13-year-old phase, my daughter really was paying attention to her ole dad. A big reason that scary creature facade goes up in the first place is lack of confidence. Everything in their world is changing—schools, friends, their bodies. So, they put up this wall. Showing them how to gain this confidence (even if it's in a roundabout way) is what they need.

My daughter, saw how much enjoyment my running gave me and she saw how physical exercise and healthy eating benefited my wellbeing and helped me deal with stress. I don't want her to copy exactly what I do, though. She needs to discover what works for her. For now that's walking every day. Tomorrow it may be riding bikes. Whatever it is, I'll be there to support her.

So, during those tough times, sometimes it's best to stand back and holdfast, but continue to be that positive and healthy role model. They really are watching and listening to you and even though they may think your outfit is hideous and outdated, they still value your input and opinions.